im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
