Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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