You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize