He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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