i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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