In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize