my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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