Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
