i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Randomize
