Joe is yelling at the trees again.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
