You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
