it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
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