How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize