3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
i think my mom watched the whole time
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Randomize
