I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
