Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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