It's just like the Real World with babies
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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