I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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