I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Randomize
