Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
