Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
