i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize