Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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