That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
