bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
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