TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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