Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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