And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
