I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
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