Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry morgoniousmonk hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(845): View more from New York

i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win

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(641): View more from Iowa

since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.

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(765): View more from Indiana

He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(651): View more from Minnesota

Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?

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(612): View more from Minnesota

Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.

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(410): View more from Maryland

Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again

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