I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
It's never too late to be topless.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
