just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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