bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Randomize