she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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