idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Where did you get a picture of my penis
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Even my vagina gasped.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
