We're facebook friends in real life
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
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