I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Randomize