Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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