You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Let's get the cat blown out
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
