Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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