Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize
