It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize