and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
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