So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
