We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
