yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I need a burrito and a hug.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
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