K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
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