Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
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Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
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we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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