There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
