And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
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