Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
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