I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
